Nancy and I have a tendency to find the most interesting things attractive. You should really ask for a list sometime, but I promise, it gets a little crazy. A random example would be a man explaining how to put a baby down to sleep. This is a rather adorable thing for a man to talk about. It makes him slightly intoxicating, honestly.
Anyway, this is my latest project:
I have a problem where I consistently wake up at four in the morning, and then fall back asleep, and then wake up again every hour or so. This has been happening for the last year or so, and it's obnoxious.
So this balloon drawing is my way of saying, all the trouble starts at four. And all I can think is, seriously? Every night?
Well, sleep tight fellows!
Be brave, go to the thing, even if it means you'll be alone with that person for an extended period of time, and it could be increasingly awkward.
I love these ladies. The blondie, Brittni, is a Southern Belle like no other before. She's classy and outspoken, all at the same time. I simply adore her and her enthusiasm for everything. She's legitimately the first friend I made at BYU. Which kind of makes her amazing :)
And Carson. The fiery and sarcastic redhead that I know and love. She's a citizen of the world, having lived in Mexico, France, Britian. She's bloody brilliant at pictures btw. She does all of mine now :)
These ladies are just fan-freaking-tastic, and Brittni is so nervous about her disney princess auditions tomorrow... poor girl :(
Anyway--
the name of this post...
wow.
okay, all yall know by now that I have a boyfriend. And on Wednesday, we reached the one month mark. Which is astounding for a commitment phobe such as myself.
My problem is, I'm so love with the idea of being in love, that I can't handle it when the real thing comes along. Don't smile and congratulate just yet--I'm not in love. But being in a relationship, of course I can't help but imagine that when that happens, I want to know that he loves me too.
And thus the fear
It's hard for me to give myself to someone in a relationship sort of way. When I told my best guy friend this summer that I had feelings for him, I assumed I had hit the jackpot. He told me he felt the same, and my terrified little heart came out of hiding and hoped beyond hope that maybe there was a wonderful guy right in front of me.
I suppose the celebratory dances my heart did were premature, being that he changed his mind.... awk.
It's all good. We're back to normal.
But now you must understand--It hasn't been an easy road for a hopeless romantic such as myself. I may be scared of relationships, but I never ever stop fantasizing. So now, being in a relationship, it feels so different than I thought it would. How will I know if I fall in love? I hear that it's different for every person
And when I heard this Joshua Radin song, I just couldn't help but get all scared. I told Nancy I should get out of this before something crazy happened. She talked me off the ledge like a good best friend ;)
