Last night I watched the documentary 'The Human Experience' about two brothers who go on a journey to find what makes people get up in the morning even in the worst possible situations.
They spend a week homeless in New York, visit the Lost Children of Lima, and travel to Ghana. I find meaning through this. What makes life worth it for you?
Here's me not looking so cute on a random walk with Celeste and wanting so desperately to go sailing.
And I've been thinking, sometimes I expect blogging to be more like twitter. Like multiple updates (with pictures!) a few times a day. Just because I like to look at people's pictures. That would get obnoxious though so I guess I can go on wishing for more pictures of people I don't actually know.
I love these ladies. The blondie, Brittni, is a Southern Belle like no other before. She's classy and outspoken, all at the same time. I simply adore her and her enthusiasm for everything. She's legitimately the first friend I made at BYU. Which kind of makes her amazing :)
And Carson. The fiery and sarcastic redhead that I know and love. She's a citizen of the world, having lived in Mexico, France, Britian. She's bloody brilliant at pictures btw. She does all of mine now :)
These ladies are just fan-freaking-tastic, and Brittni is so nervous about her disney princess auditions tomorrow... poor girl :(
Anyway--
the name of this post...
wow.
okay, all yall know by now that I have a boyfriend. And on Wednesday, we reached the one month mark. Which is astounding for a commitment phobe such as myself.
My problem is, I'm so love with the idea of being in love, that I can't handle it when the real thing comes along. Don't smile and congratulate just yet--I'm not in love. But being in a relationship, of course I can't help but imagine that when that happens, I want to know that he loves me too.
And thus the fear
It's hard for me to give myself to someone in a relationship sort of way. When I told my best guy friend this summer that I had feelings for him, I assumed I had hit the jackpot. He told me he felt the same, and my terrified little heart came out of hiding and hoped beyond hope that maybe there was a wonderful guy right in front of me.
I suppose the celebratory dances my heart did were premature, being that he changed his mind.... awk.
It's all good. We're back to normal.
But now you must understand--It hasn't been an easy road for a hopeless romantic such as myself. I may be scared of relationships, but I never ever stop fantasizing. So now, being in a relationship, it feels so different than I thought it would. How will I know if I fall in love? I hear that it's different for every person
And when I heard this Joshua Radin song, I just couldn't help but get all scared. I told Nancy I should get out of this before something crazy happened. She talked me off the ledge like a good best friend ;)
I'm feeling a bit under the weather today so getting dressed is probably not happening. Instead I have an awesome video of my trip to Chile to share here! Awesome talented Nico has skills like no other. At 18 he's more talented than any other photographer i've met or stalked. You can check out some of his photography at Dilation Studios website. And here's some of my favorite shots from our trip :)
You know those mornings when you're so tired that all you want to do is go back to sleep, and not wake up until the very last second before you actually have to or else you will be late?
That was this morning.
For some odd reason unbeknownst to me, my stupid alarm kept going off, and it took me a million years to get it to stop shrieking at me. I wanted to break my phone actually.
But I didn't.
But I so severly wanted to.
Also, did you notice that I have eye makeup on in these pictures??? Huzzah my friends, it's a miracle! I never ever put on eyeshadow. I own scads of it, but I never seem to want to take the time and do something with it. But for some reason, probably because I didn't do my hair (this is all yesterday's curl thrown up into a really messy pony), I felt like making some semblence of an effort. You like? ;)
After piling a million books on my desk I got my camera to stay up so I could take outfit pictures! It really shouldn't be this hard but until I get a super canon or an awesome friend who isn't awkward about taking photos this is what I will have to deal with.
-Nancy
P.S. Kid History videos are freaking hilarious. I cry every time I watch one. So enjoy :)
Sorry for the retarded picture... I had some issues
Outfit Details:
earrings: CHILE!
sweater: F21
black skinnies: F21
awesome alpaca lined shoes: CHILE!
I know. I have some issues taking real pictures of my outfits. My camera has problems standing up on its own and my mother always looks at me like a freak if i ask her to take pictures so i just avoid that situation... BUT! I couldn't pass up my awesome Chile shoe love. They're lined with alpaca fur. Yep. That's right. Alpaca fur. So they make for the warmest and comfiest cute shoes in the world. Plus who else in the world has them? NO ONE! Cause they're a one of a kind hand made shoe from Chile. I know i've talked about these shoes before but i still can't get over how amazing they are. Plus, it's finally cold enough for me to wear them.
So this post is kind of all over the place because pretty much all of my friends are gone so I have all of these thoughts and no one to share them with until January. Anyway, right now all I can think about is cute little puppy Siberian Huskies. I. want. one. bad. It's been a thing of mine for a while now but sometimes I feel the need stronger than at other times. I think I love them so much because they're the closest I will get to owning a wolf. Sarai and I looove wolves like no one's business and we can't be as cool as my dad that actually owned a dog that was part wolf. And, what's cooler than a sled dog?
I love when they're puppies and have black coloring around their eyes cause they look like little devils except with blue eyes! So precious... I'm dying inside right now. haha
